Just because women in their fifties don’t talk about their sexuality doesn’t mean they don’t have one! Quite the opposite. Of course, it’s easier to confide about the subject when you’re young and without taboos, but that doesn’t mean libido is lacking among their elders. They’re just a bit more discreet.
And let’s also remember some important points like the codes of another era, education, social taboos… All of which mean that women of 50 don’t pour out sexual details in public. If they feel less free to talk about it, often due to fear of judgment from others, they remain no less active once the curtains are drawn and the door is closed. So I say « stop » to preconceived ideas and I want to reestablish a few « truths. »
Imagine if your sex life stopped at 50… Horror, misery (some will get the reference).
So let’s not stigmatize our beautiful seniors and our inveterate cougars and embrace the good news. Because in reality, these fifty-somethings have a rather fulfilling sexuality, appreciating relational quality rather than a quantity that leaves one unsatisfied.
An active sex life that goes through health
This is the first point. So sure, at 50, you don’t always have the energy of your youth, but you have lived through more things. That’s what allows you to determine what you want or don’t want, what you’re looking for or not, what you accept or not. Women at 50 already have life experience, and for those who are fulfilled, you’ll notice they are generally in good health. Health is often better, and many treatments help minimize or improve the effects of menopause. In short, women at 50 today are younger than their mothers were at the same age.
Don’t be scared by the word « menopause, » but I have to mention it when talking about mature women because it often affects sexuality and preconceived ideas.
« Despite » that, we often talk about the fifties as a second adolescence. A fact recognized by health professionals like psychologists and psychiatrists. Why? Because it’s a good period for a woman. Often less constrained by personal and professional life, she can fully enjoy her best years and focus on herself. A good point since this time often corresponds to a period of doubts, questioning, and self-reflection. It’s also a time when they rediscover their bodies because their bodies are undergoing many changes again (and I’m not talking about facelifts or breast implants). Sexual maturation is at its peak, so they take advantage of it to embrace their new freedom, whether with their bodies or in their minds.
La minute ménopause
I told you, I have to mention it because all women will go through it sooner or later. Why? Because when it enters the equation, a woman (usually in her fifties) undergoes many hormonal changes. Among them, the most significant is the drop in estrogen levels, the famous hormones that affect sexuality. This decrease can cause intimate dryness and therefore make sex uncomfortable if not handled well. And thus refusals. And thus the misinterpretation of thinking that a mature woman has less libido. False.
So, the good news is that there are ways to counteract menopause. At least, its effects. It is possible to counteract these phenomena by using lubricants or local estrogens. This addresses the physical problem, but you also need to know how to communicate with your partner about the changes your own body is experiencing.
Let’s also remember that menopause is linked to a certain freedom for women. No more worries about contraception, no more periods, which can increase… their sexual appetite. Why? Because with this mental « burden » lifted, a 50-year-old woman can be more uninhibited, less concerned about her appearance, freer, and more open-minded. So the opposite of the clichés can happen. You just need to know your body well and let yourself go. It is often the misconceptions about menopause that hinder the sexuality of women in their fifties.
What does a 50-year-old woman desire? What does she fantasize about?
As I was telling you earlier, amature woman often tends to explore her desire and fantasies to flourish sexually. However, in all cases, there are common points. Desire may take longer to arise, arousal may take longer to build, and lubrication may be harder to achieve.
It is therefore important to find tips or alternatives to find your pleasure. A desire for spanking? A little whip? A romance without constraints? New sexual games? New ways to access your pleasure? A new erogenous zone? Slow sex? Tantrism? … In short, you get it, the horizons are wide in terms of possibilities. Beyond a new way of approaching their sexuality, some women in their fifties take the opportunity to fulfill their fantasies.
Et les cougars, on en parle ?
If before older men had the privilege of younger women, times have changed. Women also enjoy the company of younger men, more dynamic, more vigorous, more open-minded. That’s why the « cougar » phenomenon has grown so quickly. They too want this relational freedom and to have a good time in pleasant company. Whether for a moment of pleasure or a longer period, everyone benefits. Our fifty-something will feel a breath of fresh air, and our young man will gain a bit more sexual experience. Win-win.
Especially as social mores evolve and this trend becomes more mainstream every day. A 50-year-old woman can enter into a relationship with a younger man, regardless of the age difference between them. It even seems like a good idea because, in terms of sexuality, a 60-year-old woman is more in tune with the desires and performance of a 45-year-old man than with a man her own age. This clearly shows that age does not affect libido, quite the opposite, and that women in their 50s still have an active sex life.
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