One of men’s first fears in the bedroom is not being good enough in bed. Being more resilient in bed is often part of men’s goals. But are pleasure and stamina necessarily related, and how is it achieved?
There are many clichés that circulate about masculinity. We associate penis size, time, penetration, rigidity …… These preconceived ideas have a hard life and persist over time. However, sexual pleasure and the duration of intercourse are not necessarily linked. Especially if we look at your stockings, gentlemen.
After all, the average duration of intercourse ranges from 10 to 20 minutes: so you don’t have to run a marathon to give or receive pleasure. And it depends above all on the place we assign to penetration in our sexuality. But the obsession with performance remains. So how to be more durable in bed? Sexologists offer 6 tips that can help you.
Tip No. 1: Anticipate
One of the first things you should do before initiating sexual intercourse is ……. Empty your bladder. Or keep it full (but not so full that you have to pee). That’s strange advice, you might say. Well, it’s not.
In fact, with an empty or full bladder, you can better contract the abdominal belt or cause tension in the perineum (with a full bladder). Because yes, gentlemen, you also have a perineum. And you should also know that it is these pelvic muscles that help male ejaculation. Thus, some men control their erection better when they cum. Others prefer to have an empty bladder to concentrate better.
Everyone must find what suits him best: a full or empty bladder, but at least think about it before having sex. It will help you be firmer in bed.
Tip No. 2: Start small
Learn that power doesn’t necessarily mean strength. Penetrating your partner like a brute will not make you the best fuck of his life, and will make you even less firm in bed. Sexologists recommend even gentle penetration at the beginning of sex. It is the sensation of this advance that will increase arousal. So do it slowly, enjoying every millimeter. Learn to enjoy the journey instead of going straight for the goal.
How it works. Moving slowly has several advantages. First, it allows the penis (and especially the glans) to get used to its new “environment.” A warmer, wetter, tighter place turns it on, so there’s no need to overdo it. In fact, think of your glans, that hypersensitive little creature that reacts to the slightest stimulus. So take it easy and give it time to adjust.
That’s why many men start penetration slowly to adapt to these changes until arousal is well established. Once the penis and glans are well accustomed, you will find that you may not need to slow down in the middle of intercourse to avoid ejaculation.
And if you’re still too aroused, get off. Avoid penetration if you are ultra-sensitive. Let the pressure subside (remember your mother? An overly intense image?) while remaining erect to continue smoothly. The goal is to maintain control.
Tip #3: Lubricate, lubricate, lubricate
It’s a good idea to use lubricants to be firmer in bed. Why? Because lubricant creates a greasy film in the vagina and on the head of the penis, which reduces the sensation of friction, decreases the intensity of physical arousal and, therefore, reduces the sensitivity of the penis a bit. Best of all, you can choose the type of product. But water-based gels are the most recommended.
Keep in mind also the sensations they produce. For example, remember that lubricants that heat or cool increase arousal. So have a sweet tooth, but not too much.
Tip #4: A little strength training for the perineum
Now that you know you have one, you should know that you can work it just like a woman’s. This large muscle that runs from the tip of your anus to the root of your penis can be stimulated, toned, contracted, etc. And better control of this muscle will certainly help you have more stamina in bed.
Do this, easy. Do it while urinating, to identify the sphincter muscles of the perineum, those little muscles responsible for your ejaculation. So sit on the toilet with your back straight. And as soon as you feel ready, relax to let the urine come out naturally (without forcing or pressing on the bladder balloon).
Here you wait for the pee to come down, you don’t go for it. This is how you learn to contract or relax the perineum. These two movements help you perform better in the bedroom. Again, it’s all about control.
Tip 5: Avoid tea, coffee, soft drinks, certain peppers and spices.
Not surprisingly, our sexologists have established a connection between sexual stamina, nutrition and lifestyle. There are foods, such as those mentioned, that are irritating to the sexual organs. So don’t panic, we are not saying that you should drastically cut out all pleasures, but limiting them as much as possible is a good recommendation.
In fact, some foods can cause small contractions in the lower abdomen. This can naturally accelerate ejaculation due to the state of tension that these foods cause in the pelvic area.
In addition, all of these foods are known to cause you to urinate frequently or have more difficulty controlling your urinary tract sphincter.
Tip #6: Train yourself to be more durable in bed
Yes, it may sound cliché, but it’s true. But not just any sport (unless you care about cardio). Yoga and Pilates are often recommended. These sports activities are based on breathing and strengthening the abdominal girdle and perineum, ideal for increasing endurance in bed. They provide a very good muscle tone at this level, which we can easily transfer with sexual intercourse.
And they have the double advantage of relaxing and disconnecting. We forget about stress, and it is a definite plus to concentrate and have better control during sex. Remember that stress and anxiety can cause premature ejaculation. Afterwards, it is usually good to practice some sport to keep fit and clear your mind.
Now that you have some tips, it’s time to put them into practice!
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