There are lots of things you can do to spice up your sex life, even if you’ve been with your partner for a long time. All you need is a break from the way you and your partner usually communicate. And the best way to do that? Try out some erotic role-playing ideas.
Role-playing is basically a “vacation” from your daily life without having to go anywhere. It can be an opportunity to rewrite your own sexual history, fulfill a long-held fantasy, or simply be sexually different from your usual character. If you can overcome some initial awkwardness, role-playing could well lead to the best sex you’ve ever had.
Participating in erotic role-play in a thoughtful way can do much more than nourish your body. The kind of communication and trust involved in releasing your everyday life to be explored in the context of role-play can strengthen the bond and intimacy between partners. What’s more, the sexual creativity, excitement and intensity associated with sharing your role-play ideas and putting them into action can spill over into other types of interaction.
Before the games begin
Before taking part in a role-playing game, you and your partner need to have a serious conversation. This is when you negotiate roles, find common interests, establish boundaries and set flexible and strict limits. Both parties must agree to all aspects of the scene and the roles you will play. You also need to define safe words or gestures that will slow down or stop the scene, and make sure they are perfectly clear.
This process not only defines the roles and interaction of the sex scene you’re creating; it also fosters a sense of collaboration that can deepen your connection and intimacy outside the bedroom.
The show
What happens after sex is called “aftercare”, and it’s an equally collaborative process. Aftercare can involve deconstructing the scene and figuring out what worked and what didn’t, or cuddling, nibbling, loitering, … Taking stock of what all parties have agreed helps them return to their everyday empty space. Ready for erotic role-play ideas?
If the idea of stepping out of the box into the bedroom appeals to you, we’re here to help you get started. Check out these 40 erotic role-play ideas that go beyond the norm.
Turn on the
Is one of you the more dominant partner in your relationship, while the other is more submissive? An excellent introduction to role-playing that doesn’t involve much theatricality is to explore this dynamic.
Once you’ve defined your roles, you can either exaggerate pre-existing dynamics in the relationship, or reverse them. It could be as simple as who’s going to dominate and who’s going to be submissive, or perhaps the partners will switch roles at some point during the scene.
Special delivery
If you don’t feel like cooking tonight and want to explore a new role-playing idea, this is your ideal scenario. Let’s say you’re ordering a pizza for a meat lover and you thought you had a $20 bill in your pocket. But when the sexy pizza guy arrives, he’s nowhere to be found. You ask if you can compensate them differently, and well… you’ve got the idea.
Under your spell
Or how about a role-playing scene in which there’s the hypnotist and the hypnotized? The hypnotized party no longer controls his or her actions. Although the hypnotized party pretends to be under the hypnotist’s power, this scenario is perfect for those looking to push their personal boundaries and possibly overcome inhibitions, even temporarily.
“You are my inspiration”
Indulge your artistic side by asking your partner to come into the room, undress and pose as a model. As you gaze at your new muse, you draw, paint or faithfully capture their face in the way that moves you. Just make sure it moves you around the bedroom. It’s all part of sexy erotic role-playing.
Strangers in the night
If you want a sexy new start with your partner, simply pretend you’ve never met them before. This type of role-play can involve a catch in a bar or an online hook-up. She notes that playing a stranger or anonymous person allows for creative exploration of sexual identity and preferences. You also need to use your seduction skills to flirt and explore your partner with fresh eyes. You can modify your behavior to make her look like someone else and dress in a way your partner has never seen you before to add something to the allusion.
Between two batteries
You find yourself browsing a rarely visited section of your local library, and suddenly you spot someone who seems to be interested in what you’re passionate about. No one will probably see you both, but the trick will be to hinder each other into total silence.
“Excuse me, Officer.”
“Do you know why I pulled you over?” a cop asks, rolling down the window. Of course you do, but you also know this cop is hot. Whatever you do to help them solve your minor infraction, you’ll do it. A classic erotic role-playing game.
“Your biggest fan”
It must be fun to be a rock star and have strangers chasing you. Get a taste of it by creating a role-play scenario in which you’re a music legend yourself. You’ve just left the stage and are looking to unwind with a fan who caught your eye.
“Teach me everything you know”
Even if you and your partner have both lived in the neighborhood, assume the roles of someone with no sexual experience and someone with special techniques to share. This scenario is an opportunity to “rewrite your sexual history and recapture (or create) the exciting thrill of first intercourse, over and over again.”
I hate loving you
Hateful sex can be extremely gratifying, but you don’t have to wait until your partner has seriously irritated you – or vice versa – to have it. Just think of a past transgression or pretend your partner is someone you really hate and then have fun making it up.
Cheaters sometimes prosper
Meet your partner in an unfamiliar place, like a hotel, and try on a disguise. Then you can have fun taking off that wig and those sunglasses. This erotic role-play scenario creates a sense of the forbidden and the taboo, and simulates a dangerous situation in which getting caught could have disastrous consequences.
In pain
Every time your landlord comes to fix something, there’s serious flirting. So you decide to go to his apartment and move out. This sexual encounter is long overdue.
The joys of the job
One of you is a sex worker and the other is the client who has hired this person for the night. Place the money on the bedside table and wait for the doorbell to ring. If you’re the sex worker, list what’s on offer and what’s not. If you’re the customer, indicate what you’d like to happen. Once you’ve finished negotiating, you can have a fully transactional sexual encounter.
Seriously “Hot Yoga
While your posture is decent, your yoga instructor is eager to give you a full fit. Conditions are conducive to physical interaction, touching bodies, as well as some physical rigor. This, like much role-playing, has the potential for humor incorporated into creative seduction. And there’s nothing wrong with laughing during sex, because sex can be both hilarious and sexy.
Put your differences aside
Let’s say you’re an activist, protesting against the decision or lack of action of certain politicians. The tension couldn’t be higher, but you’re also strangely attracted to this person with whom you fundamentally disagree. And let’s face it, after the picketing, you need a release.
Scenes like this can be a source of stress for the realization of fantasies based on real events, but with desired results that can be controlled, in order to temporarily suspend the often uncontrollable results of real life.
The spy who fucked me
Trying to convince your partner to reveal the truth doesn’t have to be a struggle-it can actually be sexy. Create a role-play scenario in which one of you is a spy and the other interrogates him, both Mr. and Mrs. Smith.
Such a scene will appeal to those who like creative intrigue, and there can also be elements of creative seduction and role reversal with this role-play idea.
Don’t wake the children
You’re a single parent on the dating scene and you’ve hired someone to watch your kids for the night. After another online date gone wrong, you come home to find the kids asleep and the nanny looking good. And with a little wine in you, you’re ready to get moving.
Feeling wild
Get in touch with your basic instincts and imagine yourself copulating like ferocious beasts. This could be a great action if you find yourself alone in the woods.
“I’m a professional”
Pretending you’re both porn actors doing a scene can give you the opportunity to say all those nasty porn lines, then engage in the kind of sexual positions that have become mainstays of porn. If you have trouble thinking of details, load the clip you’re in and activate what’s happening on screen
Long-distance lovemaking
Absence makes the heart grow fonder, so why not try long-distance sex? Get into the mindset of being on the other side of the world by visiting different rooms in the house. Then treat yourself to a torrid FaceTime or Skype session, fueled by forged feelings of nostalgia. Releasing this tension will make you feel so good.
Next week, the rest of our 40 erotic role-playing ideas to spice up your sex life, so stay tuned!
