When you were a kid, you may have thought that all you had to do to impress the girls was to be a star footballer or play guitar in the band. As a young adult, you may have thought that to attract the ladies, you needed a sophisticated car or a corner office… Do you really know the ways to impress all the ladies?!
Now that you’ve hopefully reached adulthood, you realize that the women you want to attract aren’t impressed by bulging muscles, the letters following your name, what you own or how much you earn, but by the quality of your relationship with the person.
A woman of distinction isn’t just concerned with your accomplishments. She carefully observes how you behave in the world. With that in mind, here are 15 tips for becoming a more complete human being and impressing everyone, men and women alike. But especially to impress women.
1 – Understand complex social issues
Racism, sexism, misogyny, homophobia, xenophobia, intersectionality: the buzzwords of the day all revolve around fundamental human rights and the struggle to extend them to marginalized groups. Educate yourself, broaden your perspective and you’ll show a deep understanding of today’s world and your place in it.
2 – Travel
Mark Twain is famous for emphasizing the value of travel in building a healthy and charitable worldview. Don’t just leave your neighborhood or even the country. Leave your world and discover how people who don’t look like you live. Few things are sexier than a worn passport.
3 – Learn another language
There’s nothing sexier than being multilingual. While you’re visiting exotic places, learn to speak to people in their native tongue. When you return home, insert a foreign word or phrase from time to time and you’ll add a pinch of je ne sais quoi to your aura. Foreign accents always work to impress women.
4 –Volunteer
Even the most beautiful speech rings hollow if you don’t back it up with action. Show that you care about lives that don’t affect you by giving time and attention (and money) to causes that really matter to you.
5 – Listen
At a time when everyone is looking for attention, be the person who patiently hears what others have to say. Don’t interrupt or talk over people: conversation is more than waiting your turn to speak. What’s more, you’ll be able to keep certain things to yourself that it’s better not to share, especially when you’re drinking a bit – you tend to talk too much!
6 – Hold your space
As you listen, remember: it’s not your place to judge, it’s not your place to opine (unless you ask for it), and it’s not your place to solve problems. The ability to offer a safe space for vulnerability is a path to true intimacy.
7 – Improve your vocabulary
Five hundred years after his death, Cyrano de Bergerac is still reputed to have won the love of the beautiful Roxanne, not for his formidable swordplay or undeniable courage, but for his captivating wordplay and swashbuckling retort. Remember: conversation is foreplay. Words will always touch places where hands cannot.
8 – Write a letter
Forget texting, sexting and e-mailing. Buy some stationery. Get yourself a fountain pen. Compose a letter, one worthy of keeping under a pillow in your absence. Stamp it with a dash of cologne (if you wear cologne). Stamp it and mail it. When your lover discovers your missive among the subscription renewals and bills, you’ll have created an indelible memory.
9 – Develop your culture
Everything you need to know about someone, you can find out from the books he/she reads and the music he/she listens to. You’ll be judged on your physical and digital library. Read and listen to the classics, keep abreast of current events and interest, and you’ll add breadth and depth to your personality.
10 – Be considerate
Some might question the value of chivalry in the modern age, but there’s no substitute for basic manners. Doors open. Pull up chairs. Stand when a lady leaves the table. Be considerate and you’ll never have to tell anyone you’re a gentleman.
11 – Refine your sense of humor
Fart jokes are for Nickelodeon. Life is hard and few things demonstrate your ability to cope with adversity more than a shiver and a provocative smile. A woman who laughs in your presence tells you she’s comfortable. Remember the words of comic bombshell Jessica Rabbit about her husband Roger: he makes me laugh.
12 – Be kind to animals
A hundred years ago, the epitome of manliness was the image of Teddy Roosevelt on safari, triumphantly posing his latest kill. Fortunately, this version of toxic masculinity has (largely) become the way of the dodo. Animals are great judges of character: no woman will trust you if her dog doesn’t.
13 – Loving children
Whether you’re a parent or not, few things evaluate your character more accurately than your ability to interact with children. Whether it’s (appropriate) banter, attending a tea party or reading a Minecraft story, attending a tea party, treat the little ones with the same humanity as your peers and you’ll show your ability to connect with your inner child. The perfect way to impress the ladies.
14 – Act well
The hard-working people you depend on to host you depend on tips. Treat service people with dignity. Demonstrate your generous nature. Nobody likes a cheapskate.
15 – Balancing charisma with character
The greatest seducers of all time were all powerful charismatics. Unfortunately, charisma doesn’t require a moral compass. Without qualities such as honesty, loyalty, integrity and modesty, charisma can be disastrous. The ability to identify these qualities and their relative proportion to each other is essential, not only to seduce, but also to establish healthy, stable and lasting relationships.
In the meantime, you can always practice with young women who are always ready to exchange ideas with you.
